Thursday 29 November 2012

Mothers or Murders?



Mothers or murderers

I have always said i did keep this thought to myself because am not really sure it is a general occurrence or just my imagination, until this very scene played right there in my face in the early hours of this morning.

I saw this young man walking frantically as he paces restlessly with a little girl in front of him, well you may want to ask what am doing out so early, because of the peculiar nature of my area, i usually have to set  out very early to at least avoid as much of the early morning traffic as i can and usually i don’t get to see people around my street or the next  while i take my quiet walk down the road. But this morning i saw not just one but two figures, out of which there was a little girl.

It of course caught my attention, and the journalistic instinct in me sprang up, i wanted to know what they were up to, a young man and a little girl and why the young man appeared to be disturbed. While i wait patiently for the vehicle i take off with, they moved closer and knocked on the gate of a house just beside where am sitted and i continued to watch closely, while they waited for response , the young man got on phone and i heard him say:

‘’...that is what i am facing ooo my brother, i just didn’t mention it to anyone, because i can’t say it, but that is just it’’

What could he be facing? I had to strain my ears to pick what he was saying on phone, while we were at it, the gate was opened and an elderly  man came out  with two little children and the young girl who led the man there, while the man was making the call, the young girl had been allowed to go in and the children were actually what they were looking for.

According to the man’s narration, this situation isn’t happening for the first time, he had returned home late after the day’s work only to find out that his wife and kids were not at home, well am not sure if he had tried to contact his wife but not being  the first time he had known or just assumed like in the past that his children were somewhere in the neighbourhood, and as for their  mother, well???

So he had set out very early in the morning to look for his children and he has gone to one, two houses with no result, it was at the second residence  he tried that the young girl that followed him was asked to lead him to the house where they eventually found the kids, of course without their mum, the elderly man had said that the kids were playing in their house yesterday and when no one came for them, they felt it was only safe to let them sleep over till anyone of their parent show up.

The young man happy and sad at the same time thanked the elderly man and left with his kids, as he leaves , i hear him saying to the eldest, a girl of about five or six: you see what  your mother is doing to us? You see what we are going through? That is how the other day i asked her to take you to school she took you to another place, the young girl was trying to say something, though not so audible and i heard the young man say again, you want to lie to me too, don’t be like your mother!

That morning, i could not help but think as that scene led me back to my earlier thoughts; some of the so called mothers that we have nowadays, are they mothers or murderers? Murderers of great destiny, not necessarily serial killer.

Before i witnessed this scene, i have seen mothers who leave their children all through without care just to attend a party that they were not even invited to in the first place.

I  have seen mothers who would rather buy an aso-ebi because she doesn’t want  her friends to mock her, rather than assist her husband in paying for the kids school fees, the children can stay at home for as long as it will take their father to pay, she does not  mind if the children stay at home, she just have to get that aso-ebi.

I have seen mothers who do not care if their child look unkempt  or not, so long as they can afford the latest design of gold and make-up kits.

I have seen mothers who do not even care to know if their child does well in school or not,

I could go on and on, as that scene keeps playing in my head, no it wasn’t in the movies, it was real and i felt really bad, being a woman myself!

Whatever happened to those days when mothers are truly mothers, one of the sayings of  Prophet Muhammad(PBUH)  is that a child’s paradise lies at the feet of his mother and then am wondering if such kinds of mothers are included? Mothers who don’t give a hoot about their child’s well being?

I am  not trying to be mean on anyone here, you may want to argue that am not an authority here, because am not one yet but then i know you don’t have to be a biological mother to know that it is paramount for a good mother to care very well for her wards, no matter what a woman is going through in her husband’s house, lets even assume the case in this story that the husband is not meeting up to his responsibilities ,her children should come first, her decision shouldn't be at the expense of her children .

No good woman should leave her children to be ‘’community children’’ that sleep at any house night falls in on them in the community.

Our mothers should be our pride, our models, and not murderers  of our destiny or future...such kind of mothers may murder the future of their children with their careless attitude, some other children may not get the opportunity to sleep at neighbour’s house, it is really a situation for concern, what kind of parent are we making or do we want to make in our generation?

Mothers or Murderers?

I leave you to answer that!

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